Yoga is learning by doing. All we experience and learn through our own practice is true to us. It is also important to remember that however it is true to us, it is not true or the truth for everyone else. Yoga is always personal. We are able to learn if we take off our masks and are willing to face ourselves as we are.

For me it is important that yoga teacher is genuine; no roles whatsover. No playing mind-games. For me teacher must be willing to share knowledge, to give advice and guidance. I need it to happen without forcing and respecting my own process and view of the world. Like-mindedness is not important. If I notice that teacher is trying brainwash everybody to think the way teacher thinks, I run away as fast as I can. That is not yoga. I need space to figure out my own truth via my own yoga path.

As a student it is important to understand that no teacher can do your practice for you. You have to do it yourself. If you expect everything to be handed for you on a silver plate that is mental lazyness. And I believe that Pattabhi Jois was talking about mental lazyness as well when he said ''Anyone can practice. Young man can practice. Old man can practice. Very old man can practice. Man who is sick, he can practice. Man who doesn't have strength can practice. Except lazy people; lazy people can't practice Ashtanga yoga.''

For a long time I have been wondering of how people, even very experienced yoga teachers, talk about ego in the context of yoga. It really bothers me especially if people talk about crushing their ego. The Term ego, as we westernes (or New Age spiritualists) oftentimes understand it, does not apper or is not even mentioned in yoga texts. Therefore us yogis can't have ego problems. ;) We should not talk about ego in the context of yoga. Our issues with ourselves are something else, but not ego related at all. 

There is however term "I-ness" which means a person's sense of self. And we totally need it. Without it we can't exist as self-reflective human beings. The Sense of I-ness makes us who we are. It keeps us connected to ourselves and to the world around us. Think of this: how can one learn through experience of yoga if one does not have the sense of I-ness? We can't be self-aware or develop our awareness if we do not have the sense of I-ness. It should not be destroyed, we need it. 

Discussion of crushing the ego or killing it is not yoga. It is violence. Yoga is violence free path.

Soon I will start writing again. I needed this pause to contemplate on my life and yoga practice in general. But I'm glad to be back!